I'm Not That Girl
by Page Library Page
Summary: He could be that boy. But, I'm not that girl. SLASH
1. Chapter 1

**Authors Note/Disclaimer: I do not own High School Musical or any of the characters. Nor, do I own Wicked. The song is from the musical 'Wicked' and is titled "I'm not that girl". Go and listen to it, the song rocks. Even if it is a little deppressing, I hope I've managed to make the ending a happy one and hey, there might even be a sequel! If I have time, I'll revisit this story and clean it up, but I work full-time and am a student the rest of the time so... we'll have to see.**

**Warning: This is slash **(boy x boy loving)**, TRYAN** (Troy/Ryan)** to be specific, so be warned.**

**I hope you enjoy the story. And here it is...**

**_"I'm not that girl"_**

* * *

_**Hands touch, eyes meet  
Sudden silence, sudden heat  
Hearts leap in a giddy whirl**_

I wake suddenly, realizing immediately that I had been dreaming. I'd been dreaming of him; of walking through the school with him holding my hand… proud to be with me. We stopped in the theatre, standing on the stage. I turned to him and gasped at the heated look he was giving me. Holding my gaze with his own, he leaned down and placed a gentle kiss on my lips. As he pulled away, he opened his mouth to speak… and of course that's when my alarm clock went off.

_**He could be that boy  
But I'm not that girl:**_

I'm holding back tears as I get ready for the day, pulling clothes from my closet that will complement my sister's outfit without overshadowing her.

My life's been this way for as long as I can remember; my parent's always doting on my older sister (it was only 12 minutes!), giving her everything she ever wanted. As soon as I could walk and talk, I became my sister's personal assistant (or slave, as I prefer to call it).

Whatever Sharpay wanted to do, I had to do with her so she would look better. Whatever Sharpay bought, I had to buy something to match, something less fashionable, but still good enough to wear while I obeyed her every whim.

_**Don't dream too far  
Don't lose sight of who you are  
Don't remember that rush of joy**  
_

I say a prayer of thanks everyday that I was able to convince my sister that taking Drama was her idea. Drama class is the only time I can get out from under her shadow (figuratively speaking), I'm still her little back-up singer, vocal coach, go-for boy, and prop, but when I'm on stage, I feel like it's just me and the music and the audience. Like I'm taking the on a journey to a world they only dream of.

That is my dream. To make it to Broadway one day and see my name in lights, my name alone. Not 'Sharpay & Ryan' just 'Ryan Evans performing in…' well, whatever production I can get myself into.

Yes, Drama is my life. I eat, sleep, breathe, and dream Drama. At least I did until HE tried out for the Winter Musical with his girlfriend.

_**He could be that boy  
I'm not that girl**_

As I put my hat on my head, I can hear Sharpay's shrill voice coming from downstairs. "RYAN!! IF YOU MAKE ME LATE, YOU CAN BET YOU'RE GOING TO LIVE TO REGRET IT!!" she screams.

'Hopefully, I won't live that long.' I have to snicker at that thought. It's so dark and here I am, wearing a bright pink shirt and the ugliest pair of blue slacks I have ever seen. This outfit is sure to pair perfectly with whatever Sharpay is wearing today.

I'm still snickering as I make my way down the stairs and outside to my sister's car. It's insane, but the only parts of my outfit that I chose are my socks, underwear, and hat. It's a vice, but I love my hat collection.

As we drive to school, I tune Sharpay's nagging out and remember last year's adventure.

It was our first day back to school after Winter Break. Sharpay was strutting her way through the crowded hallways, leaving me to struggle through the same crowds as they closed in behind her.

"Ooh! Whoo-hoo!" One kid howls at my sister just before bumping roughly into me.

'What am I? Invisible?' I think as Sharpay walks past the entire Wildcat team, making them get out of her way. She is such a Diva.

They all called out sarcastically and I watched my sister flip her hair haughtily at the attention.

At the door, everything seems to bottleneck and I'm stuck on the Jock's side, listening to them scrap around with each other.

"The ice princess returned from the North Pole." Zeke says.

Of course, Chad Danworth had to add his two cents. "You know, she probably spent the holidays the way she always does."

"How's that?" Troy Bolton, school Super-Jock, Mr. Cool, asked.

"Shopping for mirrors." Chad replied, cracking up at his own joke.

I just rolled my eyes as they continued to make jokes at my sister's experience as they walked away, down the hall. I realized that my name was never mentioned and more depressed than anyone had the right to be on their first day back at school, I made my way to my first class.

/scene change\\

I'm the first to enter Homeroom and I immediately make my way over to Miss Darbus' desk.

"Hello again, Miss Darbus." I greet my favorite teacher, "How was your holiday?"

"Just dazzling, Ryan, dazzling!" she exclaims happily. "My beau took me to New York City and we spent the entire holiday watching shows on Broadway. It was wondrous and I have so many ideas for this years Winter Musicale."

I laugh good naturedly with her before asking, "What's the musicale called this year?"

"You'll love it," she says, "I've decided to call it 'Twinkle Towne'."

"It's wonderful." I agree. I turn away and make my way to my seat.

I have to go through the Basketball team to get there and Jason shoves me roughly, causing me to fall against Troy Bolton's chest. I blush as I try to regain my balance, but it seems I've gotten my feet tangled in Troy's school bag and all I'm capable of is useless flailing.

The whole room seems to laugh at me and my clumsiness.

"Hey, Chad!" Troy calls, having stopped laughing. "His feet are stuck in my bag. Get 'em loose, so he can go to his own desk." He says loudly.

I blush as Chad leans down behind me, still laughing as he untangles my feet. I'm hoping things can't get any worse, when Sharpay enters the room and sees me in Troy's arms, something I've been dreaming about for almost four years.

'Oh, crap.' I think. 'She's going to kill me.'

I can tell that Troy's seen my sister because his arms tighten almost painfully around me. She's been stalking him since kindergarten and everyone but Sharpay knows that Troy will never go out with her.

"Done." Chad says. He stands and moves to sit at his desk behind Troy's.

_**Ev'ry so often we long to steal  
To the land of what-might-have-been  
But that doesn't soften the ache we feel  
When reality sets back in**_

My breath catches in my throat when Troy leans down and speaks into my ear.

"Think you can face the 'Ice Queen'?" he asks. All I can do is nod in reply.

Troy lets me go slowly, as if to make sure I'm steady on my feet and I move away from him, quickly sitting at my desk, keeping my head down.

I sneak a peak at the rest of the class and watch from under my hat as a new girl comes into the room and hands her paperwork to Miss Darbus. Troy's bragging about his exploits over the break, his back is to the new girl.

As Sharpay makes her way to her desk (or throne, the way she acts), the new girl passes in front of Sharpay and past Troy, heading to her seat. She seems to have caught Troy's eye, because he's not paying any attention when Sharpay gets right in his face, flirting full-force.

"Hi Troy." She giggles.

Troy nods as he replies. "Hi." His eyes are glued to the new girl and I wonder if they know each other or if I'm witnessing love at first sight.

Miss Darbus turns from the blackboard. "I trust you all had splendid holidays." She greets. "Check the sign-up sheets in the lobby for new activities, Mr. Bolton." She admonished Troy, causing him to snap out of his funk, or whatever, and turn in his seat to face the front.

"Especially our winter musicale. We will have singles auditions…" Miss Darbus continues.

I watch Chad lean forward and ask Troy if he's ok. Troy nods and says, "Yeah."

As Miss Darbus continues her spiel about the musicale and auditions, I continue to watch as Troy pulls out his cell phone and calls a number. Someone's phone goes off and Sharpay, the new girl, and I all check our phones.

"Ah, the cell phone menace has returned to our crucible of learning." Miss Darbus says, moving to the front and getting her empty paint can.

"Is it our phone?" Sharpay asks.

"Sharpay and Ryan, cell phones." Sharpay gasps at the injustice as she and I put our phones into the can. Miss Darbus scoffs, moving to the new girl. "We have zero tolerance for cell phones in class, so we will get to know each other in detention. Cell phone.

"And welcome to East High, Miss Montez." She greets, moving on to Troy. "Mr. Bolton, I see your phone is involved. So we will see you in detention as well."

"That's not even a possibility Miss Darbus, your Honor, see 'cause we have basketball practice, and Troy..." Chad frantically tries to get his friend out of detention.

"Ah, that will be 15 minutes for you too, Mr. Danforth. Count 'em."

The resident genius, Taylor McKessie, pipes up, "That could be tough for Chad, since he probably can't count that high."

"Taylor McKessie, 15 minutes." Miss Darbus snaps and Taylor gasps.

"Shall the carnage continue? Holidays are over, people Way over! Now any more comments, questions?" Miss Darbus asks.

In the back, Jason timidly raises his hand and Miss Darbus acknowledges him.

"So how were your holidays Miss Darbus?" Jason asks.

The entire class looks at Jason. "What?" he asks.

The bell rings and everyone starts to leave, heading to their next class. When I leave, I see Troy standing outside the room, waiting for someone. I get away from the crowd and turn to him just as the new girl come out of the classroom.

"Hey!" he says in greeting.

"I don't..." she says.

"Believe it." He finishes.

"Well me..." she starts.

"Either. But how?" he finishes. I'm getting dizzy.

"Well my mom's company transferred her here to Albuquerque. I can't believe you live here. I looked for you at the lodge on New Years Day." Miss Montez says.

Troy starts whispering, "I know, but we had to leave first thing."

"Why are you whispering?"

"What?" Troy asks. He didn't even notice. "Oh, uh... well my friends know about the snowboarding. Um, I haven't quite told them about the singing thing."

I'm stunned. Troy Bolton sings? Suddenly, I think I just might have a chance to get close to him. If Troy likes to sing, then we have something in common. My feet are still firmly planted in reality and I know better than to hope for anything more than friendship from Troy… but I do hope.

Someone calls out to Troy and he waves back.

"Too much for them to handle?" Miss Montez asks. I really wish I knew her first name.

"No, it was cool. But, you know, my friends, it's uh... it's not what I do. That was, like, a different person." Troy replies, following as Miss Montez suddenly turns and goes down a hallway as he finishes his sentence.

I follow closely. "So, uh... anyway, welcome to East High. Oh, now that you've met Miss Darbus, I bet you just can't wait to sign up for that." Troy says, pointing at the winter musical sign-up sheet tacked on the bulletin board.

The new girl just laughs, "I won't be signing up for anything for awhile. I just wanna get to know the school. But if you sign up, I'd consider coming to the show."

"Yeah, yeah." Troy rolls his eyes, "That's completely impossible."

"What's impossible, Troy? I wouldn't think impossible is even in your vocabulary."

I cringe and shrink behind a pillar when I hear my sister's shrill voice. I make a quick escape to my next class and regret not being able to hear the rest of Troy's conversation with the new girl or getting the chance to talk to him myself.

"RYAN!!"

I jump at Sharpay's voice yelling into my ear.

"What?" I ask, blinking blearily. I must have fallen asleep thinking about the past. I look around and realize we're at the school. 'Yup. We're here.' I think. 'And Sharpay's managed to gain attention and embarrass me at the same time.'

"Get out!" she cries.

I roll my eyes in exasperation and get out of her precious car. "Fine, Sharpay. See, this is me getting out and oh look! I'm leaving, too."

I turn on my heel and head into the main school building. I'm shocked by all the greetings I hear being directed at me and in a shocked daze I call back my own helloes.

"Hey! Evans, how's it going?"

I turn to my left and grin at Chad as he makes his way through the crowds to my side.

"Hello to you, Mr. Danworth." I say, teasing him about his having to call me Mr. Evans the whole summer. "What have you been up to since the Talent Show?" I ask.

"Oh, you know this and that. Going out with Taylor, catching up on that stupid summer reading list, and playing hoops with Troy and the gang." He shrugs and shakes his head. "Did you hear about Troy and Gabriella?"

"Umm, no, why?" I ask curiously.

"Well, they broke up after the Talent Show. I'm surprised that Troy didn't say anything to you."

"Why would Troy tell me about his breakup? Troy doesn't even like me, Chad." I reply, a little bit sad at that fact.

"Oh, umm, well, I don't know." Chad stutters. "And you know Troy likes you, I mean, come on, he did the Talent Show with us and…" Chad's just about to continue when a new voice called out to him.

"Chad! Hey man, what's up?" It's Troy and he's right behind us. I blush when I turn to him and realize just how close Troy's standing.

"Hey, Troy, We were just talking about you." Chad says.

"Oh, really?" Troy asks, "And were you saying nice things about me?" He smiles at me and I can feel my heart race at the attention.

"Yes, of course we were." Chad says, nudging me.

"And how are you, my dear Ryan?" Troy asks me as he places and arm around Chad's shoulders and the other across mine.

"F...f...fine." I manage to stutter. "Thank you for asking."

Troy starts leading us to class and the whole time I keep thinking that this whole thing is a dream.

"Ouch!"

Troy and Chad both laugh at my outburst. "You were spacing, so I pinched you."

I raise my eyebrow. 'Ok, so not dreaming.' "Thank you, Troy. I now know I'm actually awake and why did you pinch my butt?"

"It's a cute butt." Troy says with a wink as he and Chad continue down the hall, leaving me speechless in my classroom doorway.

_**Blithe smile, lithe limb  
She who's winsome, she wins him  
Gold hair with a gentle curl  
That's the girl he chose  
And Heaven knows  
I'm not that girl:**_

I only catch glimpses of Troy the rest of the day and I find myself wishing for a chance to talk with him.

"RYAN!"

I turn away from my sister's voice. I'm still angry and hurt from her kicking me out of the talent show. We'd been performing in the Lava Springs Talent Show together since we were little kids. Its tradition and I can't understand what my sister was thinking.

So, I stay away from Sharpay, trying to get a handle on my emotions.

_**Don't wish, don't start  
Wishing only wounds the heart  
I wasn't born for the rose and the pearl  
There's a girl I know  
He loves her so  
I'm not that girl:**_

At the end of the school day, I find myself hiding in the auditorium. Hiding from my sister, various teachers wanting to thank my for my parents' generous donations, my thoughts in general.

I've been sitting on the stage for almost 20 minutes when I hear a door open and close, admitting someone into my sanctuary.

I keep my eyes closed as whoever it is approaches and sits next to me. Thinking its Chad, I lean against him, silently asking my friend for comfort.

I feel his arm come around my shoulders, holding me close as I start to cry. I've never been good at keeping my emotions to myself and it seems the whole summer is catching up with me. I'm crying and crying and it doesn't seem like I'm going to stop anytime soon.

I'm pulled against Chad's chest and his arms go around me, holding me tightly in his lap as he rocks me, trying to calm me down.

"It's ok. It'll be alright." A voice whispers in my ear. I don't even notice that it's not Chad.

"I'm here with you, Ryan. You can cry all you need to, I won't leave you alone. It's ok. It'll be alright." The voice keeps whispering sweet nothings into my ear as whoever it is continues rocking me.

'It's reassuring to have someone see you having a break-down and not run away. To have them hold you and give you an anchor while you're trying to get yourself under control.' I think as I start to calm down.

I'm not sure how long I cried, or how long after I finished that he kept holding me and rocking me, but I was thankful for every minute.

"Thank you." I whisper. I don't quite trust myself not to break down, I mean, what self-respecting teenager just has a random meltdown?

"It's not a problem, Ryan, never a problem."

I turn my head and look up into the strangers face and find myself staring into Troy Bolton's eyes.

"Oh." Apparently, I'm speechless from the shock.

"Before you say anything, please hear me out." Troy says. I nod slightly.

"Ok, here's the thing. I think… no, I know that I like you, Ryan. More than a friend should and I realize you might think that this is really sudden and all, but I've felt this way since my birthday.

"You gave me a brand-new basketball." He says and I nod again.

"Well, it wasn't so much the gift that made me start thinking about you as it was what you said. Do you remember?"

"I told you that even though were had never been friends and probably never would be, that I wished you luck in all your games and that I would be cheering for you no matter what." I said quietly.

"Yeah, and it made me wonder why. I mean, it's true we've never really been close or anything and I wondered just why you would say something like that to me.

"I couldn't get you out of my mind. I can't stop wanting to go out with you…" he trailed off.

"Troy, are you saying you like me and want to d…date me?" Of course, I would stutter.

"Yeah." He sounds sheepish.

"Well, then I guess my answer is yes."

"Yes? As in, yes Troy I will go out with you on a date tonight?" Troy asks,

"Yes, Troy I will go out on a date with you tonight." I repeat back to him.

I watch as his eyes light up, full of joy and I smile up at him. I'm still smiling as Troy helps me stand and then takes my hand, leading me out of the auditorium and into the sunlit parking lot.

"Well, then what are we waiting for? Let's get this date on the road!" Troy exclaims, practically dragging me to his truck.

I'm laughing as we pull out of the school parking lot. 'This couldn't have been a better way to start my senior year of high school.' I find myself thinking when Troy leans over at the first stop light and places a gentle kiss against my lips.

THE END.


	2. Chapter 2 author note

Hey Ya'll, just wanted to update you on what's up with this story!

I finally sat down and created a podfic (fan fiction read aloud) version of my story _I'm Not That Girl_.  
You can find it here, just remove the spaces after pasting: http:// audiofic. jinjurly .com/im-not-that-girl

Also, check out the rest of my work here: http:// audiofic. jinjurly .com/category/readersly-hostetter  
& the Audiofic Archive here: http:// audiofic. jinjurly .com/

Ciao All! Let me know if you have a recommendation for me to podfic, LOL.

~~Sly_Hostetter (Page; Library Page)


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